Ooo It’s about “F*@k-this-Place” O’Clock

A lot of time my rants come from places that I just cannot stand. These rants fall under the…”ooo what time is it? ooo it’s about f&*k-this-place o’clock….”

On today’s installment of “f*)k-this-place” O’clock, we’re going to Wal Mart boys and girls. That’s right…the place of all that is evil. Now, going to a store should seem like a simple damn task. Noooo not at Wal Mart.

  1. Why is it COMPLETELY impossible for me to go to Wal Mart and leave ONLY with the things I need on my list??
  2.  It’s says “Wal Mart” not “allstupidpeoplewhodontknowhowtoactinpublic Mart”
  3.  The more  venture out in public the more I become let down by society. Now I know it’s just a store, BUT is it really that damn hard to pull yourself together and look somewhat acceptable?? Good Lawd people. I want to just stand in the front and hand out mirrors to people who obviously do not have them at home.
  4. Contrary to popular belief…Friday is NOT bring your badass heathen children to Wal Mart day, mmk? Leave them at home. In their cages.

These are just my random thoughts about a 1-hour trip to Wal Mart. Why is it just like the black hole of ridiculousness?? And with that, I would like to leave you with Wal Mart story time, brought to you by the many faces of That Girl…

humphHere is my…”sure…I’ll wait right here. You go ahead and wait for the little lady to load all of her groceries so you can get her parking spot. Don’t bother looking 2 spots down at the empty spot!!!!”

ha“Go right ahead and stand in the middle of the damn aisle!! What do I need to pass for? I’m sure picking out bandaids is a hard decision”

imagewa“Oh no, it’s ok. You’re excused. Thanks for moving”meMy praying face… “Dear Lawd, please make this bad ass child stop screaming and move out of my damn way before I ram him like a damn bumper car”kidYes. Yes I am mean mugging a 5 year old. And I don’t give a damn!

youYup. Now I’m looking at you stupid for not controlling your kid, who by the way is probably drinking drain cleaner by now because you are not watching him. Good luck with that…mmk.

madYou have GOT to be fucking kidding me. 20 items OR LESS. LESS=19 and under. It does NOT mean take your 50 items and checkout 3 times. I swear to bajeezus I am going to cut you with a damn spork.

walmart2HOLY SHIT!! I made it out of Wal Mart without killing people. Praise tha lawd!!

Stay safe kiddos!!


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